Peter with his son
Peter found FamilyWise while working through challenging custody arrangements in the family court system. After an initial separation period from his son, Peter was approved to see him for one hour a week through FamilyWise’s Supervised Parenting services. “The first couple times that I saw my son was very emotional for me, because I hadn’t seen him for six months, and by that time, he was already walking,” says Peter. “I missed seeing him learn how to crawl and learn how to walk…”
While the situation was painful, Peter relished the opportunity to spend time with his child and shared how important FamilyWise staff members were to his becoming comfortable with the process. “I think everybody that I met, everybody that I worked with, they were all quite understanding, and very good to work with.”
Over time, the Family Court allowed unsupervised visits with his son and Peter was encouraged to participate in FamilyWise’s parent education program. Peter describes the knowledge and support he gained through parent coaching as transformational.
“I learned about childhood development, I learned about co-parenting, and a really big part of it, for me, was that I had a resource there to be able to provide support while I was going through a really difficult legal custody process.” His Family Specialist not only supported his learning about parenting but also eased his journey through the court system.
Peter explained the mental toll the legal process can have on parents. “I think that people going through the custody process can somewhat be stigmatized, and it’s difficult to really talk about what you’re experiencing.” Having a non-judgmental space to work through day-to-day challenges and learn how to talk to his loved ones about what he was going through was critical for Peter’s personal wellbeing and his ability to support his son.
Peter was eventually awarded joint custody and the knowledge, skills, and confidence he gained at FamilyWise are helping him be the best parent he can be for his son. “I received valuable tools to help me understand what he’s going through as a child, developing at certain ages, and, for me, to be there to support him in his development.”
Today Peter shares his story as a way to help other parents facing similar challenges. He participated in FamilyWise’s Parents as Leaders program, which empowers parent leaders through training and networking. “Having actively been involved in the custody process, and knowing how difficult it was, and is, to go through that process, I felt as if I could benefit by hearing other parents’ stories and telling my story as well.”
Peter recently joined the FamilyWise Board of Directors, where he uses his unique skills and experience to inform FamilyWise programs and to advocate for parents in his position. “The story that I want to try to tell is that I’ve been there, I’ve gone through that, I know it is difficult, but there are resources out there, like working with FamilyWise, working with a parent coach who can help you survive that, and also actually come out better on the other side.”