Honoring Parent Perspectives – Reflections from the 2025 Parent Leadership Conference
Each year, FamilyWise celebrates Parent Leadership Month, a time to recognize the many ways that parents contribute to strong families and communities. This year, we hosted our first Parent Leadership Conference, where over 30 parents and community and systems leaders joined together at Prospect Park United Methodist Church for conversation and learning about how we can address parental stress and support family wellbeing by listening to the wisdom of parents in our communities.
At the event, participants defined parent leadership in several ways. “Being a leader is being a teachable person. Learning from your own and others’ attributes, skills, mistakes,” shared Tracy, a graduate of FamilyWise’s Parents as Leaders Program. Several attendees talked about parent leadership as being an advocate for your child. According to Lisa Deputie, who facilitated the event, “Parent leaders are recognized partners and consultants and should be honored for their expertise.” But unfortunately, parent perspectives aren’t always valued or even invited to the table.
Parents As Trusted Partners
Event speaker – Rena Moran, Ramsey County Commissioner
A panel of parents talked about challenging circumstances when they were left out of important decision-making processes. Kanisha noticed that her son was not being challenged enough in his special education classes at school. When she questioned the design of his IEP (Individualized Education Plan), she was not treated like a partner. “I was told that ‘the team’ had decided. But I thought that I was part of the team…. It tore me up. It took my power away from me because I couldn’t speak for my son.”
Calvin has gravitated towards using his experience to help mentor others, at work and in his own life. Incarcerated as a young father, the majority of decisions about his child’s life were made without him. “I felt angry and inadequate,” he said. “It took time to learn to hold myself accountable.” Now Calvin sees his past experiences as an asset. “I can use my personal life and experience to help others avoid mistakes I’ve made,” he says.
Representatives from community-based organizations and systems shared their experiences partnering with parents. “Trust is a really big factor,” shared Nikki Newman of Ramsey County Child Protection. She suggested that an important way to build trust is through community education so that people better understand what Child Protection does and doesn’t do. “In Child Protection we want to engage whole families to support parents so that they’re not doing it alone.”
Another way in which Child Protection and other systems can support parents is through the use of parent mentors, parents with lived experience in the system. One parent recalled the trauma of having her children removed from her home – an experience that she felt no child protection worker could understand without direct lived experience. Her story demonstrates how hard it is for parents to trust systems. “When a worker comes into a home,” she said, “parents immediately put up their guard.” She advocated that parent mentors can better establish trust with parents and families through shared understanding and nonjudgemental support.
Reimagining Systems Supports for Families
Participants at the event agreed that systems have caused harm for generations and that communities and systems need opportunities to image what could be done differently. Alia is creating these opportunities by facilitating collaborative co-design sessions between parents and systems leaders. “One group can’t come up with the answer,” said Tanya Anderson, Alia’s Senior Director of Learning. “We need to collectively change policies to keep families together.”
In roundtable conversations, participants discussed the critical role that parents play in system accountability. “Parents will tell you what the barriers are in the systems and needs that are still not being met,” shared one participant. “We are the ones the programs serve, so they need to support us and meet our needs.” Attendees generated a list of ways that systems can improve their engagement with families, including education and training to reduce bias and negative perceptions of system-involved parents, relationship-building, using relatable language, and advocating for ethical treatment of all parents and children.
One parent expressed that the Parent Leadership Conference was a step forward on that path. Speaking to the group of parents and representatives from a variety of family-serving sectors, “As I look out, I feel like I’m being heard and seen. As a black woman I often feel like I’m not getting through. I can’t explain how good this feels to me. Hearing your stories and being heard here.”
The day ended with a call to action by Ramsey County Commissioner Rena Moran, who celebrated the impact of parents and lifted up the importance of parent voice in the many systems that affect our children.
This event was made possible by the Sheltering Arms Foundation. Thanks to all speakers and attendees who shared their wisdom and insight at the event. Special thanks to QPI Minnesota and ThinkSmall for sharing valuable information and resources with event attendees.
Learn more about FamilyWise’s parent leadership efforts at https://familywiseservices.org/parent-leadership-program/.